Thursday, September 22, 2011

An explination of When Love Ones Pass

The two "poems" I posted were written a long time ago.  I know neither of them are very good and most likely not technically considered poems.  They were just somethings I had to get out of my heart and put on paper.  I've posted them because I wanted to preserve them and to remember the people I wrote them for.

When love ones pass was written originally for my brother Ronnie but when mom passed I added her because it fit and I miss her as well.

Ronnie died on May 2, 1998.  He drank and drove and paid a high price for that decision.  Ronnie had one of our cousins Josh in his truck as well as our cousins best friend Robbie at the time of the accident.  Both of them were fine considering what they had just been through.  Our cousin had road rash on his back.
I had gone to San Antonio for a girls weekend with some ladies from work.  I get a call around 6 AM.  It was my husband saying my brother had been in a car accident and had died. Just thinking of that call I could hyperventilate.  By that October I was so stressed out after my brothers passing that my back went out and I was not able to walk for the first time. It took about 3 weeks of medication and physical therapy for me to be able to get back to work.
If I felt like that can you imagine what my parents went through?  My mom. Oh my goodness.  I thought she would literally die of a broken heart.  Mom has reunited with my brother.  My dad is still struggling with the loss of his only son.  With as sick as he has been all of his life he thinks it should have been him before either Ronnie or mom.  He just can't figure out why God hasn't taken him yet.
It has taken years to get over the loss of my brother.  There are still days when it's hard. Other days I get so mad at him for being selfish.  Ronnie not only left behind a set of parents who loved him, 2 sisters and a host of relatives he left behind a son that was 3 years old as well as a stepson that was 16.
I did not write the "poem" until after my cousin Jason passed. I wrote the Lone Star Cowboy and then I just started writing When Love Ones Pass. Sobbing the whole time.  It was very cathartic.  Again, I know they are not the best thing that has ever been written but, it sure helped me during a tough time.
I will give you a the back ground on the Lone Star Cowboy tomorrow.
Hope you have a great day!
Jackie

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